*Category*: Humor
*Spoilers*: Unsafe
*Description*: A shameless song-fic to the tune of "Suds in the Bucket." 
Apologies to Sarah Evans. (Clark/Alicia)
*Notes*:  And worse - it's a *country song*!  Well...don't say you weren't
warned.
*Disclaimer*: Not mine.  Not mine.
*Feedback*: I fiend for it.

***

Clark was in the barn loft - they say it was a little past nine 
When Alicia pulled up - a white pickup truck 
His folks shoulda seen it comin' - he's tired of feeding girls a line 
Plus, he mopes enough - and you can't stop love

She wept tears on his shoulder - "Sorry but I got to go!" 
"Oh, and one more thing!" It was a Red K dose 
His eyes were aglow - so the story goes 

Now his daddy's in the kitchen - starin' out the window 
Scratchin' and a rackin' his brains 
"How the heck them cows gon' feed themselves today?" 
And Martha's blaming herself for shacking up with Lionel 
Bad karma's what's making Clark high
He left his trousers in the loft
And her lead bracelet lying nearby

Now don't you wonder what Lana's gonna whine about Monday morn 
No one quite like this has stolen Clark before 

Well she must have been a virgin - Cuz' God knows Clark is one 
They're rumbling in the hay - having too much fun 
Course you can't fence time - and you can't stop love 

Now all the students in the Talon, gossipin', blabbin'
Sippin' on mocha latt 
How could 18 years just teleport away? 
Our little raven-haired nerd growed up to be a looker
Now he's gone in the blink of an eye 
He left his trousers in the loft
And her lead bracelet lying nearby

She's got her pretty white dress, her stockings and her garters
And they're headin' up to Vegas tonight 
How could 18 years just teleport away?
Our little raven-haired nerd growed up to be a looker
Now he's gone in the blink of an eye 
He left his trousers in the loft
And her lead bracelet lying nearby

He left his trousers in the loft
And her lead bracelet lying nearby