by Lyra Sena
A/N: Written for the SV Flash Fic Challenge. Plot bunny from thdancingferret: Clark and Lex at a techno rave.
Thanks: To Nifra for the fantastic beta, as always.
These are long days - punctuated by a dripping, clinging heat - and they stretch seamlessly into nights that pass in muted waves of color and lights and sounds. Here in the city, he is alone, and free, with no one to answer to - no one to question him or force him to believe things he knows aren't true. Because he isn't needed, and there never was a place for him - never will be - to belong. He's tasted liberation and he'll never go back home.
Clark knows power. He's cocooned, enveloped in its stark, sharp tendrils every moment.
The quiet edge of loneliness is forgotten along with everything else, as the wind scratches into his hair and the ruby ring on his finger snaps bright teeth against streetlights. He swings the motorcycle in front of the club, screaming to a halt and his swagger reflects a bravado that heightens with each step.
He steps through the doors, owns the place.
Pushes through tight bodies that press at him on all sides, sprawls into a corner booth and just...surveys. Licks his lips and knows his eyes give away every bit of the predatory desire coursing in him. People are sliding together, nameless faces meeting for brief moments in lust-filled movements.
So many to choose from, and he can have any, can have all. Can do whatever he wants and no one to tell him it's wrong or that he needs to stop, or that it's just not him, because...it is. Now.
Lets his gaze skitter restlessly, and he knows he's searching for something or someone but his control doesn't waver when he finds two pale eyes sliding up to meet his. Strides across the room, tugs fingers into his hand and pulls, careless of stumbling feet and murmured protests.
There is no room for two of them, not where heaviness falls like a cloak amidst muffled groans. Stumbling blind through black fogs of bodies, writhing and twisting, Clark flings out wildly, parts the crowd easily, exploding out a partially hidden door that spills into the alleyway.
Shoves Lex against the brick wall and roughly clenches Lex's chin with unkind fingers, tilts his face outlined in midnight, searching it in the dull fade left by a half moon.
"Is this what you want?" and why Clark asks is neither consequential nor important.
Lex's eyes turn obsidian, glaring, daggers thrown between their faces. With an irreverent toss of his head, Clark crushes his lips against the soft mouth, charts the curved ridges of flesh with his tongue. Grabs Lex by the shoulders and shoves him down to his knees, and Clark curls his hand around the soft scalp.
"You came to find me?" Clark bites out, roughly jerking the zipper down on his jeans.
And eyes like waves of onyx pooled, turn upward. Hands seek his in a stilling movement. Lex slides up, his back pressed to the wall, holding Clark's gaze as though he might lose himself if he looks away. Face to face, nothing between them except heavy nightfall and untold stories - words that will never be spoken.
"Yes," Lex says, simply, with more emotion pushing the word from between his lips than Clark knew existed, and like some kind of crash into a bottomless whirl of consciousness, the weight of feeling threatens to drag him under, tempting, whispering love and forgiveness -all the things he wants to forget.
"Suck me," Clark demands, voice grey, shadowed, numb.
Lex curls seeking fingers against Clark's cheek in a caress that sparks through his memory, and Clark closes his eyes. Brief glimpses of slow touches over his skin and the taste of juniper in his mouth crowd his thoughts and he tries to disentangle remembrances of other nights, shaded in lines of twilight.
Other nights, before this clutch of disaster that follows now like a scythe, cutting, powerful like spiraling suns and planets wrapped in steel.
Back into those long lines of twilight, back past the cutting curve, back to when he was far away from home, or so it feels even now...
Too many people on the streets, the sun luminously bouncing off sidewalk puddles, and tall buildings stretch into a hazy sky.
It isn't the way it all began that still amazes him, or how weightlessly their lives entwine and overlap. It's the slide of Lex's pale fingers against his, and the rush through his lungs when Lex leans back in the leather chair, hand raised in mid-air while he talks into the phone, feet propped on his desk. How leaning against the counter, Lex turns and gives him a half-grin and Clark is immobile and just...stares.
They pull up outside the club and Lex gracefully unfolds himself out of the car and, walking around to open Clark's door, smiles at Clark's dazed expression. A neon sign blinks, hot pink and orange colliding artlessly in irregular strokes. His eyes rake along the crowd of people pressed along the line of the building, and a restless impatience stirs.
"Come on," Lex whispers, and Clark nods stupidly, blindly stumbling from the car, following. A small nod to the man at the door, and they're inside. There's a moment of confusion, with streaking trails of garbled conversation and a pulsing crash of lights and the steady thumping glide of music burning into him. Clark keeps close to Lex, trails hands down soft leather, over his back, and laces the slender fingers he finds with his own.
Lex leans up, breathing lightly against his ear. A long shiver trails up his spine, intensifying when Lex's hand comes to rest on the small of his back.
"What do you think, Clark?*" Lex drawls.
A circling pulse of blinding white glints off in sparks, illuminating Lex's eyes, diffusing pale slate. Clark turns his head, ducking slightly to press his mouth along the curve of Lex's neck.
"Perfect," he mumbles into the smooth skin.
And it is, to Clark, when Lex is pressed full length along his body, their hips grinding together and Lex's hands marking territory down his back, cupping his ass. Lex painting his body with touches that make no room for questions, or doubt, that Clark belongs to Lex.
Here, so close, he feels the strong pulse of Lex's heart, and when Lex smiles, Clark sees white teeth shining, azure eyes outlined in crinkles of something... indefinable. Lex tilts his head toward the back of the club, and Clark simply folds Lex's hand in his and starts walking.
The path's obscure and it passes too slowly before they're breathing in the night air, fumbling with buttons and zippers and clothes are being ripped but neither cares. Hands can't find heated skin fast enough, and suddenly the moment blurs at alarming speeds. Clark pants, moaning Lex's name into his collarbone, sucking and licking and tasting.
Lex is on his knees before Clark can draw in a shaky breath, looking up at him with slivers of eyes hidden by heavy lids, pushing Clark back against the wall. The moon shines down, luminous, shades the tiny alley with lines of longing, of desire, and then Lex's lips are around him, hot tongue and heavy breath making Clark shake and groan.
Explosions can be controlled and timed, or they can startle and ignite quickly and leave in their path scorched earth, dry and brittle reminders of grass and leaves and gaping holes in memory that sight and sound can't fill. When Lex is on his knees in front of Clark, mouth stretched and eyes pouring into Clark's, release is sudden, quick. His eyes snap shut and colors break open, spill like rushing water crashing over rocks and rupturing serene calm.
Clark laughs low, his breath coming in short puffs, and the pounding of his heart is muffled only slightly by the thudding music escaping the club behind them. Lex is reaching out, fixing, straightening, arranging them back to proper order and presentability, and Clark wants for just once to shock the hell out of Lex. He looks at Lex through a fall of dark lashes and says, "Let's go home." He playfully wrestles away from Lex's wandering hands and stumbles a bit before slowly walking backward, wicked grin gleaming and challenging Lex, and...runs.
Clark stands by the car in a wash of artificial yellow light when Lex rounds the corner of the building. He winks and leans against the door, hip jutted out and just smiles. *Shadows dance in Lex's eyes, a twinkling reserved only for Clark, and Clark knows this: underneath layers of roughened reserve there are parts of Lex that shine.*
"Best blowjob of your life, huh?" Lex teases casually, tossing him the keys.
Clark merely smiles and opens the door for him, leaning to brush a soft kiss across Lex's lips as he gets in the car.
"Don't look so smug," Clark retorts, and the smooth copper lines of the streetlight that fall in streaks across Lex's face remind him of the lake, in summer. He would lie on his back and watch the setting sun through the trees, the leaves spinning and turning the path of the rays to shine and wrap around him, and when Lex's eyes slip slowly over his, it all feels the same. Like Lex's gaze can warm him, because Lex is the brilliance, is light, and all of it swirls in Clark's mind.
So closely that he fears one day the radiance might explode - like an improper chemical reaction, coiling and building, until nothing can contain it.
Lex clutches his feelings close, but even under the immensity of his restraint, colors spill through, vibrant and intense. Each moment they're together it's like violet buffering waves meeting the lowering sun, stretching endlessly around them, encircling them, and Clark knows this is life.
The fingers are still soft stroking his cheek, and his head snaps back, hitting the wall behind him. Bricks crack, the sound spreads into air. He came to escape, to rid himself of his past life, forget the lies and the hiding and all the hurt he's caused and never wants to think about. And he hasn't, but now...
It's here. Staring him in the eye, chafing against the stockade of denial, stirring the edge of something bitter and sore that cuts into him, engraving him with a rounded, gentle intensity. Clark can feel the past crawling into his skin.
"Clark..." but Lex chokes, brushing fingers down across Clark's face, his neck. And Lex collapses onto his knees, leans forward and warmth surrounds Clark - it opens, takes him in a breadth of understanding, as if Lex thinks this is what Clark needs. His knees buckle, and the heavens are falling toward him in spires of black smoke.
It's everything he doesn't want, everything he never wants to remember, everything that means nothing.
Everything that used to be all he wanted.
It's suffocating and he wants to get away from Lex, from the tenderness that has no place with them out here. He wants something raw and harsh and...nothing like the look on Lex's face.
And it's subtle, even barely visible in night's murky breath, but the cocoon that cradles his shoulders cracks, releasing boundaries and walls and all the truths that he just can't face like boulders. As they tumble down he shoves Lex away and stumbles back. His body reels, following the wind on an isolated path.
He disappears into the night and doesn't look back.
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