Prelude to a Blow Job

by Fizzabith

Written for SVFF, organized by kormanfan.

Rating: PG-13/R

Category: Dramedy

Group Hugs: to alymalone, carlanesses, lexalot and swtalmnd for the audiencing and all around cheerleading.

Extra Big Squeezie Hugs: to svmadelyn for the Instabeta, especially while she's in pain, and to kormanfan for organizing this ficfest. Thank you!

kelex asked for Chlionel.
This is the other pairing.

Disclaimer: If they were mine? Lex'd have his own show. On cable.

Feedback: Makes mouths happy.

Lex looked on curiously as the deliveryman handed Clark the envelope and walked away. "Aren't you going to open it?" he asked.

"It's probably just junk mail," Clark said. "I'll open it later."

Lex watched Clark walk away into an empty elevator and press a button. The doors closed, and Lex's curious expression twisted into a glare. Fuck this, Clark, he thought. He stormed towards the elevators and pressed the call button. A moment later the doors opened and Lex stepped in, jabbing the button for the lobby. Personally delivered junk mail, Lex thought, rolling his eyes.

Surprisingly, Clark hadn't left yet. Instead, he was standing just outside the entrance to the Smallville Medical Center, his face a mix of wonderment and ire as he studied the envelope in his hands. Lex smirked. Junk mail, my ass, he thought, and he pushed through the revolving door and called after Clark.

"What," Clark snapped, turning around.

Lex held up his arms in a whoa-there-tiger gesture. "Clark, I'm just concerned for you." Lex took a tentative step forward, and when Clark didn't bolt he took another one. "Waking up in the middle of a road, in the middle of a cave." Clark continued to eye him warily. "Getting mysterious packages delivered to you at the hospital." Lex gave him a cockeyed smirk. "I just want to make sure everything's alright."

Clark rolled his eyes skyward and gave a huge, shrugging sigh. "It's really nothing, Lex. I'm fine." And he turned back towards the envelope, promptly getting lost in his thoughts.

Lex tried again, attempting what he hoped was an innocent-looking grin in Clark's direction. "You know, I really am burning with curiosity to see what's in that envelope. What kind of junk mail would be delivered to someone at a hospital?" He cocked his head towards it. "And you've already torn it open..."

Clark whipped around this time, and with a full-on glare. "You know what, Lex? You're way too interested in my package. And you're constantly asking me all these questions, that I don't have answers for, and you never stop. You say you're my friend, but you sure don't act like it a lot of the time. I think you probably need to get laid more or something. To distract you from your totally unhealthy obsession with my mail."

Lex raised an eyebrow. "Is that so, Clark? Getting laid will sate my curiosity?" He stepped right up to Clark, practically touching him. "Well, it might sate my curiosity about some things," Lex smiled like a shark. "But it will hardly tell me what's in that envelope, will it."

Clark sighed again. "Oh, for Pete's sake, Lex. There's really nothing in this envelope that's of any interest to you. Leave it alone."

Lex reached up and brushed some imaginary lint from Clark's shoulder. "Clark, you acted like a spooked horse when the deliveryman asked for you."

"I'm not used to getting things couriered to me."

"Clark," Lex slid his hand down Clark's arm and squeezed his bicep gently. "Just tell me what it is you got."

"It's really nothing, Lex. Just..." Clark closed his eyes. "Look, I've won the Publisher's Clearing House," he added flatly.

Lex looked at him in disbelief. No way was Clark so stupid as to think he'd believe that. Which meant something else entirely was going on here. And Clark just wasn't going to tell him what. "Sure, Clark." he said, all hints of a smile falling from his expression.

Clark looked towards the street. "I've gotta go," he mumbled, "But I'll talk to you later?"

Lex dropped his hand from Clark's arm. "Go ahead." He waved Clark away. Lex turned to go back inside. He'd seen the relief spread across Clark's features when he'd dismissed him. And it hurt.

Lex sat at his desk alternately rifling through papers and playing minesweeper when he heard his office door creak open and shuffling footsteps approach. He didn't look up at the sound, just spoke. "What can I do for you, Clark?"

"Do for me?" Clark asked. "I just wanted to apologize for before."

Lex opened his email and made as though he were reading it. "Apologize for what, Clark? Perhaps you were right. In fact," he looked at Clark and pushed his seat back from his desk. "Maybe we should test your theory." Lex raised an eyebrow teasingly.

The shuffling stopped. "My theory?" Clark asked. His eyebrows rose up to his hairline.

Lex smirked and stretched his arms behind his head. "Whether or not I'm too obsessed with your package."

"Obsessed? With. My... Oh!" Clark grinned. "That theory." He walked up to Lex's chair, squatted down and folded his arms along the armrest. "We should definitely prove that theory."

Lex shoved Clark's arms off the edge of his seat and snickered as Clark lost his balance and landed on his ass with a thump. "Have at it, Clark," he grinned and motioned towards his crotch.

Clark pushed himself back up to his feet and looked at Lex aghast. "What, no foreplay?" He smiled and sank down in front of Lex, slowly unbuttoned Lex's shirt with one hand, casually brushing over a nipple as he worked, and leaned in to lick lightly at the pale, soft skin as it was revealed. With his other hand he stroked delicately along Lex's cock, feeling it begin to swell.

Lex closed his eyes and sighed. "We're just sweeping everything back under the rug."

Clark kept stroking Lex's cock through his slacks, but pulled his head back and rolled his eyes. "Orgasms, Lex. Focus," he said, his voice husky. Then leaned in again to suck gently at the pulse point on Lex's throat.

Lex slid down in his chair. But behind his eyelids, he rolled his eyes too. "You know," he said slowly. "Theories can never be proven. They can be tested and tested over again, but they can only be supported."

Clark nodded thoughtfully. "And we definitely want to make sure this theory is adequately supported."

"Mm," Lex agreed.

"So we may have to experiment often," Clark continued.

"Mrf." Lex slipped lower.

"Like, a lot," Clark added.

Lex cracked an eyelid. "Hey, Clark, when the Prize Patrol arrives, be sure to swallow, would you?"

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