Well, why not?

by LaCasta


Feedback or I eat the chocolate!
(In true evil fashion, of course, I have every intention of eating the chocolate anyway.)


Title: Well, why not?
Author: lacasta1@yahoo.com
Rating: G
Disclaimer. Not mine at all in the least.

Why did Lex Luthor turn evil: The interviews

Interviewer: We're interviewing various people who knew him during the earlier days. Lana Lang, why do you think he turned into a criminal mastermind? Lana Lang: The day my parents were killed, and the day that I was stuck with being the fairy princess for the rest of my life, I think it did some other things, too. I'm trying to move on and that's why I wear a piece of the meteor that killed them. Interviewer: This ties in with something that Chloe Sullivan was suggesting earlier. Chloe? Chloe Sullivan: It all fits! The meteor rocks are behind it. Probably the Illuminati, too, and I suspect the Milk Marketing Board. But it's mostly the meteor rocks. After all, it's weird, the meteor rocks are weird, and so there's got to be a connection. Interviewer: Jonathan Kent has another theory entirely. Mr. Kent? Jonathan Kent: The apple doesn't fall very far from the tree. As the boy is bent, so grows the man. You can't escape heredity. Character tells and chickens come home to roost. Interviewer: And for another view from the previous generation, Mr. Lionel Luthor. Lionel Luthor: He did it to disappoint me. Interviewer: Pete Ross has a theory that actually explains everything quite logically. Pete Ross: [opens mouth, interviewer interrupts] Interviewer: We're just about out of time. Our penultimate guest is Clark Kent. Clark Kent: I'm pretty sure it's my fault. If I didn't have this overgrown sense of responsibility, it wouldn't have happened. Interviewer: Now, we'd like to ask the man himself. Mr. Lex Luthor, what made you turn evil? Lex Luthor: Well, all these theories are very amusing but I put the blame, or should I say credit, solidly behind a very simple cause. Every episode, thwack, somebody hits me on the head, hits me in the gut, hangs me upside down, stabs me, or ties me up. Do you know how many insurance companies have laughed in my face when I've filled out the forms to explain what happened? Chiropractors and Armani slings don't come cheap. That's all there is to it. OWWWWWWWW! Interviewer: Sorry, sorry, sorry, the sound folks really didn't mean to drop the boom on your head... Lex Luthor: Go away.



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